[The episode opens up with a metal Viking dummy made out of Gronckle Iron.]
Gobber: Are you sure you've got the recipe right?
Fishlegs: Of course I'm sure, three parts limestone...
[Snotlout swoops in on the dummy, with Hookfang taking a blast at it.]
Gobber: Yeah, three parts limestone...
[Gobber and Fishlegs slap hands. Cut to sky, with Hiccup riding Toothless.]
Hiccup: Give it all you've got, bud.
Fishlegs: Two parts sandstone...
[Toothless blasts the metal Viking.]
Gobber: Sandstone, check.
Fishlegs: One part iron ore...uh-huh, a down low!
[Gobber and Fishlegs high five each other..]
Fishlegs: And now...the secret ingredient...
[Barf and Belch stomp on the metal Viking.]
Fishlegs: One giant spoon of cooled and hardened Gronckle lava!
[Barf and Belch play tug-o-war with the Viking, and Ruffnut joins in.]
Gobber: Gronckle lava, of course!
[Meatlug spits up Gronckle lava.]
Fishlegs: Voila! You have Gronckle Iron.
Astrid: Alright, let's see how your Gronckle Iron holds up against a close-range spine shot.
Fishlegs: Be our guest.
Astrid: Stormfly, spines.
[Astrid points to the Viking. Tuffnut suddenly appears into the scene, muttering to himself.]
Tuffnut: Giant, furry...
[Stormfly charges towards the Viking and Tuffnut]
[Hiccup realizes Stormfly is about to hurt Tuffnut.]
Hiccup: Tuff, no!
Tuffnut: Even...teeth were furry...
[Stormfly is getting closer to Tuffnut and takes a shot. The spint hits the Viking and just barely misses Tuffnut's head.]
Tuffnut: Thank Loki, you guys are not gonna believe what just happened to me, it was-
[The metal Viking falls on him. The others run up to him.]
Tuffnut: We'll talk in a little bit.
[Scene cuts to later inside.]
Tuffnut: There I was: me, and my inner Nut.
Hiccup: Tuff, what happened out there?
Tuffnut: It was dark. So dark it, Hiccup. Not even the moon to light my merry way. And then all of a sudden, out of the darkness. Red eyes! Ferocious teeth! A growl that could peel the beak off a chicken!
[Chicken bawks warningly.]
Tuffnut: Sorry, metaphor. It grabbed me, and tossed me around like a rag doll, a very handsome rag doll. And then, it left me for dead.
Fishlegs: Tuffnut, can you tell us anything else about what attacked you?
Tuffnut: It was far too fast, too...cagey, too...quick, give me another adjective!
Snotlout: Ooh, how about, "imaginary?"
[The others laugh.]
Tuffnut: Laugh and guffaw, if you must, but would an imaginary beast give you one of THESE?
[He shows his arm which has a red bite mark on it. Chicken approaches it, inspects it, then bawks. Cut scene to later, when Fishlegs is trying to find out what bit Tuffnut.]
Fishlegs: Ugh, there's nothing anywhere that matches this, the Book of Dragons, Bork's papers, even the Dragon Eye.
Gobber: Hm, it won't be any of those.
Gobber: It's obvious we're all thinking the same thing.
Hiccup: Well, I can pretty much guarantee we're not, but, uh, why don't you tell us what you're thinking, Gobber.
Gobber: Lycanwing. The Lycanwing dragon is a rare beast, and a vicious one at that. Those who survive its bite are not actually survivors at all. They are doomed to a life as half-man, half-Lycanwing. At the height of every full moon, the condemned viking transforms into a terrifying ragon! Wings the size of a house, teeth stronger than Gronckle Iron! And a thirst...for blood.
[Tuffnut yells in fear.]
Hiccup: Tuff, the Lycanwing is a legend! It's not a real dragon! Gobber, have you ever seen a Lycanwing?
Hiccup: Has anyone on Berk ever seen a Lycanwing?
[Snotlout and Fishlegs look at each other. Hiccup looks around the room.]
Gobber: Not that I can recall.
Hiccup: I rest my case.
Gobber: But the stories...oooh! They'll straighten the hair on a curly-haired yak!
[Cut scene to outside, Gobber holding a torch and Snotlout and the twins sitting in front of him.]
Gobber: His name was Kessler.
[Gobber zooms into Snotlout's face.]
Snotlout: That's a weird name!
Gobber: Weird kid. Bright red hair, eyes as black as night! Naughty as a Nadder in a chicken coop.
Tuffnut: That's seriously naughty. Am I right? [To Chicken.] High-three!
[Chicken stares at him blankly.]
Tuffnut: Heh, nevermind.
Gobber: One night, little Kessler, against his parents' wishes, went exploring in the forest. Days went by, no sign of him. Only a far away scream, coming from the woods. The little bugger never returned.
[Gobber turns around quickly, scaring the gang.]
Gobber: AHHH!!! Or did he?! Every year from then on, when little Kessler's birthday rolled around, a red, black-eyed dragon would fly over his parents' house and pluck one of their sheep right out of the paddock! The dragon would look back, taunting them. BUUUT I wouldn't worry, Tuffnut, you're not exhibiting any symptons.
Snotlout: Hey, hey, hey, can we really say for sure what our pal Tuffnut is exhibiting? C'mon Gobster, lay em' on us! Just for the sake of argument.
Ruffnut: I don't think that's a good idea, Snotlout.
Gobber: Well first off, you'd be looking at sensitivity to light.
Snotlout: Aren't you always that it hurts your head when you look into the sun?
Tuffnut: Yeah...I did say that.
[Tuffnut stares into the embers. He recoils from the brightness of it.]
Gobber: Unquenchable thirst...
[Tuffnut gasps and rasps, licking his fingers.]
Snotlout: You look thirsty...!
[Ruffnut smacks Snotlout's face away from Tuffnut.]
Ruffnut: Hey! He always looks thirsty.
Snotlout: What else, Gobber? There's gotta be more than that.
Gobber: Fidgety arms, on account of the wings starting to sprout.
[Tuffnut's arms start fidgetting and twitching, one slapping Ruffnut in the face.]
[Ruffnut falls backwards.]
Ruffnut: Watch it, would ya?
Tuffnut: Geez, sorry. I'm fidgety.
Snotlout: What else? What else?
Gobber: Finally, the overwhelming desire to eat fresh fish.
[Tuffnut runs over to Barf and Belch, who are feeding from a trough full of fish. Tuffnut dunk his head in and starts eating.]
Tuffnut: Yeck, tastes terrible!
Snotlout: Ahahaha! How awesome was that? What an idiot.
Ruffnut: You have no idea what you've done.
[Transition to inside where the rest of the gang are. Tuffnut wheels in his belongings.]
Hiccup: Uhhh...Tuffnut? What are you doing?
[Tuffnut sighs sadly. He stops in front of Snotlout and takes out his mace.]
Tuffnut: I give you Macey. Hold her dearly, she likes sitting by the window, looking at the moon...the full moon. Ha! The irony.
Snotlout [sarcastically]: Oh my Thor. That's so thoughtful.
[Snotlout tosses Macey behind him.]
Tuffnut: Fishlegs. I give you my favorite bowl.
[The bowl has a picture of Meatlug on it.]
Fishlegs: Hey, that's my bowl!
Tuffnut: And now, now you've found it. Eat well, my friend. Eat well. Hiccup, Hiccup, Hiccup. What do you give the man who has everything. Here.
[Tuffnut grabs Ruffnut.]
Ruffnut: Hey, you can't give me away!
Tuffnut: In time, she'll come to you. She's going to take this very hard, and will most certainly go through a prolonged morning period. She's gonna need a new twin brother. I nominate you. It's a terrible job and she smells horrible. You'll have to dress like me and grow your hair long, so there are perks.
Hiccup: Alright, alright! What did I miss?
Tuffnut: I'm just...preparing myself.
Astrid: For what?
Tuffnut: Astrid, have you seen that moon? It rises to its apex, which I think is a word that means the tip-top. I'm going full dragon, Tuffnut Lycanwing.
Tuffnut: You're a funny guy, Snotlout. I'll eat you first...
[Tuffnut makes growling noises.]
Hiccup: Tuff, we went over this. The Lycanwing is a myth, it's not real, you're not turning into a dragon! Fishlegs, will you please tell him?
Fishlegs: Uhuhuh? Mmm...
Tuffnut: Now, I must go and say my most difficult goodbye of all, if you'll excuse me.
[Snotlout bursts out laughing.]
Ruffnut: What did I tell you? WHAT DID I TELL YOU?! YOU are gonna help me fix this, Snotlout! YOU HEAR ME?!
[Ruffnut walks away angrily.]
Snotlout: Wow, they can really get riled up, huh?
[Hiccup grunts angrily. Transition to outside, where Tuffnut is with their dragon.]
Tuffnut: Barf, Belch. My winged brothers! I'll see you in the friendly skies. Who knows, maybe we'll slide down a rainbow together.
[Barf and Belch rumble, and Chicken squawks at Tuffnut.]
Tuffnut: OK, you ready?
[He heads on into the stables. Barf and Belch look at each other.]
Tuffnut: Hm, this should work. Good view, got a good ventilation. Gotta keep the others safe from me, when I turn.
[Tuffnut closes the door of his stable. He sits down, and Chicken bawks at him.]
Tuffnut: I feel you, my animal brother. Huh, my last night as me, for tomorrow, at this time, alas, I shall no longer be human. I will be Tuffnut, Lycanwing, Killing-Machine!
[Tuffnut makes strange eating noises, as scene pans into the nearly-full moon. Cut to next morning.]
Gobber: Well, I did my best. He's not talking to anyone but that chicken. And he's convince the moon didn't apex last night, so it must be tonight.
Tuffnut: Talk to me, chicken. Talk to me. What did they say? What are they saying?
HIccup: Well that's great.
[Hookfang appears in the sky.]
Astrid: Is that...?
Hiccup: Ruffnut...flying Hookfang?
Astrid: Where's Snotlout?
Gobber: There he is. Big lump behind her. Tear-stained face.
Ruffnut: Oh, rough one.
[Hookfang blows steam angrily at her and lumbers away. Snotlout groans in pain in the background.]
Hiccup: What are you two doing? We could use you right about now.
Ruffnut: We've been gathering samples?
Astrid: Samples of what?
[Ruffnut shows Snotlout's arm, and Astrid and Hiccup recoil.]
Ruffnut: Dragon bites. One of these has to match Tuff's and convince him that this Lycanwing deal is just another one of his paranoid fantasies.
Hiccup: Aaand...why is Snotlout...?
Ruffnut: He started this stupid thing with his impressive yet sinister powers of suggestion. It's all Snotlout's fault my dopey brother thinks he's turning into a dragon.
Hiccup: Well looks like you're in this one, Snotlout.
Ruffnut: Not so funny now, is it?
Snotlout: No, Ruffnut. Not funny at all.
[Ruffnut grabs Snotlout.]
Ruffnut: Let's go, pal.
[Snotlout groans. Fishlegs and Meatlug appear in the sky.]
Fishlegs: Hiccup, Hiccup! Oooh, you're not going to believe this! I was at my wit's end, trying to think of something, anything, that could help with this, when my perfect little angel crushed my desk, and look what I found!
[Fishlegs shows a Dragon Eye Lense.]
Fishlegs: It's the one you found in the caves with Gustav! I've been meaning to give it back to you, Hiccup. I'm usually not so irresponsible with priceless artifacts.
Hiccup: Fishlegs, we have got to go see what's on it!
[Cut to Tuffnut in his stable with Chicken.]
Tuffnut: I'm telling you, it's not flat, it's gotta be round, or oblong, at the very least. Think about it. The moon, round. Sun, round. My head, oblong.
Ruffnut: Uh...I hate to interrupt this fascinating debate, but...
Tuffnut: Stand back, sis! It's not safe to be around me right now. I could go at any minute.
Ruffnut: Yeah...whatever. Just hold out your arm we need to check something.
Snotlout: Oh, for the love of Thor, do it. I'm pretty sure I need serious medical attention.
Tuffnut: Whoa, what happened to you?
Snotlout: Ask her.
Tuffnut: What happened to him?
Ruffnut: He's helping me find out what happened to you.
Tuffnut: I think we all know what happened to me...
Snotlout: Any day now!
[Ruffnut grabs Tuffnut's arm with the bite on it and compares it to Snotlout's arm. She sighs.]
Ruffnut: Well, we can cross Terrible Terror, Night Terror, Wild Nadder, and Gronckle off the list. Let's go.
Snotlout: I'm not going anywhere with you! You're stark raving mad!
Ruffnut: Let's go, I said!
Snotlout: Ugh, okay okay okay I'm coming ow ow ow!
[Transition to Ruffnut and Snotlout back out looking for more dragons.]
Snotlout: This is the last one, and I'm officially paid back. And anyway, how was I supposed to know that he'd go this crazy?
Ruffnut: What? Have you met my brother?
Snotlout: Fine. Whatever! Man, I am so glad you're not my sister.
Ruffnut: No. You wish I was your sister. You think I'd be dragging your monkey butt all over the jungle risking your life if my brother weren't the most important thing in the world to me? Think about that!
[Snotlout groans. Cut back to the stable. Tuffnut is receiving flying lessons from Chicken.]
Tuffnut: Haha, yeah!
[She puts out Snotlout's arm with more bites.]
Tuffnut: Whoa, awesome! I love the pus! What kind of bite is that?
Ruffnut: Sea snake.
Snotlout [muttering]: Oh, I don't feel so good...
Ruffnut: Another no match.
Tuffnut: Hey, aren't those things supposed to be poisonous?
Ruffnut: Don't think so.
Tuffnut: Nah, I'm pretty sure they are.
Ruffnut: Nope, you're wrong!
Tuffnut: I'm pretty sure I'm not.
Snotlout: Oh guys, there's ever pus...
[Snotlout collapses onto the floor.]
Tuffnut: Ha! Told you. Do I know my sea snakes or what?
[Snotlout groans and writhes in pain, twitching his face.]
Tuffnut: That is seriously creepy. Should we check his breathing?
Ruffnut: Ehhh wimp.
[Ruffnut drags Snotlout away. Cut to night in another room with Hiccup and Fishlegs with the Dragon Eye.]
Fishlegs: Ugh, well that's it! That's every combination I can think of.
Hiccup: Wait wait wait I see something! Let's try this. Toothless?
[Toothless lights up the Dragon Eye. A projection shows on the wall.]
Hiccup: Now am I crazy, or is that a man with dragon wings instead of arms?
Fishlegs: You aren't crazy...and there he is again, with a tail to go with the wings. Hiccup?
HIccup: Can you make out what this says?
Fishlegs: "No man shall tread on these shores lest he become what he is most feared." That must be Lycanwing Island.
Hiccup: And that, my friend, is why we always listen to Gobber.
Fishlegs: Hiccup, this Lycanwing, it could be, well, not a myth.
Hiccup: That island's not far from here.
Fishlegs: Why do I get the feeling we're going on a little Hiccup-Fishlegs recom mission?
[Cut to stables.]
Hiccup: OK, Fishlegs. If we do happen to run across a Lycanwing, we need to have a really good plan.
Fishlegs: How about, "don't get bitten?" That sounds like a good one to me.
Hiccup: Yup, me too. OK. Lycanwing Island, here we come.
[Tuffnut watches from his stable. Chicken sits on his head.]
Tuffnut: Lycanwing Island? OK, don't tell anyone, but I didn't actually believe it before, I was just trying to mess with their heads, you know, be quirky and eccentric, by giving away my stuff, and locking us in here. Plus, I get along with you. How could I know it would come to this? How could I know it was real?!
[Tuffnut and Chicken stare at each other. He grabs chicken.]
Tuffnut: How could I know?! [He growls.] How could I know...
[Cut to Hiccup and Fishlegs riding to Lycanwing Island.]
Hiccup: OK, Toothless. Give us some light.
[Toothless shoots a blast. A bunch of bats fly out.]
Hiccup: Let's go, Fishlegs. Don't worry. I'll be right next to you the whole time.
[Cut back to Dragon's Edge.]
Ruffnut: Alright, this better match 'cause I don't know how much more he can take. Tuff? Do you see what I see, Snotlout?
Snotlout: I don't know, I think I've gone blind from all the venom...
[He collapses on the floor.]
Ruffnut: He's out, Tuffnut on the loose. This is bad...This is very bad...
[Cut to forest. Tuffnut makes strange noises with Chicken by his side.]
Tuffnut: I can't be contained, Chicken. Look at that moon. A matter of hours, it will finally apex, and I will be transformed, into a great scaly beast! With nothing to do but feast on my prey!
[He sniffs the ground and roars.]
Tuffnut: Oh! It's like all my senses are alive for the first time! I can feel things! See things! Hear things I've never been able to before! You know what I mean, Chicken?
[In his crazy imagination, Tuffnut looks at Chicken in a dream-like state.]
Chicken: Yes, Tuffnut. I understand.
[Tuffnut yells in surprise.]
Chicken: What's the problem? I thought you wanted to converse with Chicken.
Tuffnut: Ah...oh Chicken, I did! I've longed for this moment...
[Tuffnut lifts Chicken up.]
Tuffnut: If only it could last forever. But only a fool lives his future in the past. Our time is short, Chicken. Come, our fate awaits.
[Cut to Lycanwing Island.]
Fishlegs: "Beware the beast. Turn back before you become him. Your fate is sealed!" Did you hear that, Hiccup?! Our fate is sealed!
Hiccup: Fishlegs, we're fine. It's just an old cave drawing.
FishlegsI can't believe we're gonna die chasing an imaginary dragon.
[They hear rumbling. They see a shadow of a dragon.]
Fishlegs: Hiccup? There it is! If I have to go girl, I'm glad it's with you.
Hiccup: Alright, Toothless. Light. Look, it's eyes...
Fishlegs: I am not looking into that thing's eyes, do you know me?!
Hiccup: Fishlegs! Would you just look?
Fishlegs: Hiccup, are those...?
Hiccup: Dragon Eye lenses...
[Cut to Dragon's Edge.]
Hiccup: Gobber, how's Tuff doing?
Gobber: Hahaha. Gone. He and the Chicken flew the coop last night, said something about taking flight off the tallest cliff when he went "full dragon."
Hiccup: You didn't try to stop him?
Gobber: I was a bit busy.
Fishlegs: Doing what?
Gobber: Extracting sea snake venom from Snotlout. You should have heard him. He sounded like a yak being turned inside out.
Hiccup: Well, we better go tell Ruffnut.
Gobber: Gone too. Went to go look for her brother. She seemed to think whether he was a dragon or not he wouldn't survive "the flight." Dragged Snotlout with her. Personally, I'm surprised he made the trip. The boy's not looking so well.
[Cut to the forest.]
Snotlout: I don't know if Gobber got it all. [He burps.] I'm starting to feel a little woozy, and all I see is fog.
Ruffnut: It's foggy, you muttonhead. Hurry up, Snotlout, before Tuffnut jumps off a cliff or something!
Snotlout: You think he needs a full Lycanwing to remember all the nasty stuff I said to him?
Ruffnut: Well, he did say that he was gonna eat you first. Hopefully he'll be quick. No, actually I hope it'll be slow and painful.
[Tuffnut pops out of nowhere, yelling, hanging down from a tree, spooking Ruffnut and Snotlout.]
Tuffnut: I am Lycanwing! Run, run for your lives...
Snotlout: Ah! Ah no get away from me!
Ruffnut: Ugh, oh god. Tuffnut! Get back here! I command thee...Lycanwing! Oh...slow down! Slow down...
[Cut to Snotlout running away. He hears growling and rustling.]
Snotlout: Huh, is that you? Buddy?
[Something jumps out at him. Cut to Tuffnut at a ledge, howling at the full moon with Chicken.]
Tuffnut: The apex is upon us! C'mon, do it with me, Chicken! It feels so good! And we only have a few moments left till we can fly! FLYYY! Riding high! The currents of the wind blowing through our hair! Ah, I mean, your feathers, you have feathers, not hair-FREE from the bonds, that bind humankind! We have to fly away, right? I would never forgive myself if I ate the other dragon riders. I mean, on the other side though, I'm sure as a dragon I would find them delicious, especially that Fishlegs, good Thor he looks like a marshmallow! Flesh-colored in with a little hair on the top.
[Tuffnut makes strange, animalistic noises.]
Tuffnut: Ahhh! It's happening, it's happening, I can feel it! Are you ready, Chicken? Are you finally ready to be free?!
[Tuffnut extends one leg out towards the edge of the cliff.]
Ruffnut: TUFF! DON'T DO IT!
Tuffnut: Ughhh! We've been through this, Chicken! Don't try and impersonate my sister. We made a pact! I'm doing it and you're coming with me.
Ruffnut: Tuffnut, it's me! Look at me, bro! You can fight this!
Tuffnut: I can't, sis. You don't know the hold it has on me. It has its claws on me.
Ruffnut: What if we fight it together? We do everything together, we always have! Look, I refuse to spend the rest of my life doing anything alone. Do you hear me?!
Tuffnut: You always were the brave one. Mom should have named you Tuffnut.
Ruffnut: But she didn't. She named you Tuff. I'm begging you! And you know how much I hate to beg, just get down from there!
Tuffnut: It's too late to stop the metamorphasis, can you not see what I've become? MEEEHEHEHE!
Hiccup: Tuff, stop! There is no metamorphasis, alright?. You are not turning into a dragon. Fishlegs, pelase tell him.
Fishlegs: It's true! We found the cave of the Lycanwing. It was just a myth to keep people away from these!
Tuffnut: No. No! I don't believe you. Look at me. I'm hideous, I'm terrifying!
Astrid: Tuff! You're not hideous! Terrifying at times, yes. Hideous? No.
Tuffnut: Well, then how do you explain this? Can't do it, can you, hm? That's what I thought. Now, it's time to fly!
Snotlout: Wait wait wait wait! Wait! I can explain! I can explain it!
Tuffnut: Whoa, you look worse than I do.
Hiccup: Uh, Snotlout? What do you have in that bag?
Snotlout: I have what did this!
Tuffnut: Ah! The Lycanwing got him too. Save yourselves!
Snotlout: It's not a Lycanwing. It's not even a dragon! It's a wolf. And I caught him. You're not turning into a dragon, Tuff.
Tuffnut: I'm not? I'm not!
Hiccup: That's what we've been trying to tell you.
Snotlout: I just made you think that! But it's not true. It's funny, but it's not true.
[The ledge breaks off, and Tuffnut falls off with Chicken. Toothless grabs him.]
[Tuffnut grabs Chicken.]
Tuffnut: Don't worry, buddy! I've gotchu. We're going home Chicken. We're going home.
Hiccup: Oh, thank Thor.
[Ruffnut runs up and hugs Tuffnut from behind.]
Tuffnut: Oh I know what you're gonna say, you realized how much you love me, you were scared, you were gonna lose me, and I better never do that again.
Ruffnut: Actually, I was just going to tell you what an idiot you are. Come here.
[The twins hug. Ruffnut looks at Chicken behind Tuffnut.]
Ruffnut [whispers]: Thank you.
[Chicken bawks at her.]
Hiccup: Uh, Snotlout, where's the wolf?
[Wolf point of view: the wolf lunges at Snotlout who screams.]
Night of the Hunters, Part 2 (transcript)
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Snotlout Gets the Axe (transcript)