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This is the transcript page for Animal House, complete with full dialogues and actions.



Transcript

(A Deadly Nadder and a Monstrous Nightmare play in the air above Berk )

Hiccup (v.o.): Here on Berk, we made peace with the dragons. We're finally living and working together...and it only took us three hundred years. There's one slight problem... we forgot to tell the animals.

(The dragon pair land on Mulch's farm and wrestle, scaring all the animals)

Mulch: (Shoos away the dragons) Oh, not again. You go on now... you get, get, shoo! Now you know you're not supposed to be in here.

Mulch: (Goes over to the animals to collect their products) Alright, everybody, time to earn your keep.

Bucket: (Looks in the chicken coop) It's chickens who lay eggs, right?

Mulch: Do we really need to go over this again?

Bucket: No...

Mulch:Apparently we do. Well, pay attention Bucket.

Mulch: (Points at sheep) Wool. (Points at Chickens) Eggs. (Points at yaks) Milk. Was that so hard now, see?

Mulch: Ugh. Observe. (Starts to milk a yak) Just grab the utter, like so, and pull. (No milk comes out) Uh, pull. Pull! (Yak gets frustrated and kicks away Mulch) Uh-oh. I think we're empty. That's not good.

(Scene changes to Hiccup and Astrid 'sledding' on their dragons down a snowy mountain, doing various things to thwart the other pair)

Hiccup: Yahoo!

Astrid: Ha-ha-ha!

Hiccup: Whoa! Hey, Astrid!

Astrid: Oops, did I do that?

Astrid: Hey! Not fair! AH!!

(Astrid goes to a tree and got hit)

Astrid: So it's gonna be like that, huh?!

Hiccup: I have no idea what you're talking about!

Hiccup: Whoa! Hey!

Astrid: It was her idea. But I approve! Ha-ha!

(An avalanche starts rolling down the mountain behind them)

Hiccup: Uh-oh!

(Toothless and Hiccup cannot take off into the air)

Hiccup: His tail's frozen!

Hiccup: Astrid!

(Astrid and Stormfly takes off)

Astrid: HICCUP!!!

(Hiccup tried to fix Toothless' tail)

Astrid: Ah! Hold on!

(Astrid goes to Hiccup)

Hiccup: No! Go back!

(Astrid attempts to help Hiccup as they careen toward a deep crevasse with the avalanche coming up behind them. All four fall in as the avalanche rushes overhead)

Hiccup: Astrid?

(All are in complete darkness)

Astrid: Over here. Hiccup, I'm freezing.

Hiccup: Come here. (Huddle together) Where are the dragons?

Hiccup: Toothless? (Breathes out a blast into the snow above for light)

Astrid: Stormfly? (Spits out some flame for light)

Hiccup: (A hole opens up in the snow above letting in sunlight) Whoa.

Astrid: Yeah...

Hiccup: I see daylight!

Astrid: We're gonna get out of here!

Hiccup: Look what they did. (Both dragons are forming a shelter around their riders with their wings)

Astrid: They saved our lives.

(Hiccup and Astrid realize they are holding on to each other)

Hiccup: Uh, um...that was...so...

(Astrid clears her throat)

Hiccup: So, we're good now?

Astrid: G-good as new... (Punches Hiccup in the arm)

Hiccup: Ow!

(Scene changes back to Mulch's farm)

Gobber: (He is underneath a yak looking for what's wrong) Ah, uh... there it is, mm-hmm! (Pushes out from underneath the yak) Just what I thought. She's not giving milk... none of them are.

Stoick: We know that, Gobber. We want to know why.

Gobber: This reminds me of the time I moved my mother in with my goat. She was mean, ornery, ate everything in sight. The goat was so sacred of her, she couldn't give milk.

Stoick: So, what are you saying, Gobber?

Gobber: Mothers and goats don't mix. Same with farm animals and dragons. We stopped fighting dragons, so now they're around all the time. The animals are spooked.

Gobber: Like I said, spooked.

(Bucket starts gripping his head in pain)

Mulch: Uh-oh. Your bucket's not tightening up on ya, is it?

Bucket: No, I'm just... FIIIIIIINE!!!

Mulch: Well, whenever his bucket gets tight it means a storm is coming.

Bucket: No storm, everything's fine.

Mulch: Bucket...

Bucket: I don't want there to be a storm! If lighting strikes me bucket, I could end up less intelligent.

Mulch: Oh, ho-ho! That's one tight bucket! And the tighter the bucket, the bigger the storm.

Stoick: But that's crazy. Storms don't hit this early in the season.

Gobber: And besides, who ever heard of predicting the weather with a bucket? That's what chicken bones and goose feet are for.

Mulch: If you recall that bucket of his predicted the Blizzard of Olaf!

Bucket: That was a bad one! It took us a week just to dig Mildew out.

Mulch: And the rest of our lives to wonder why we bothered. Trust the bucket, Stoick.

Stoick: You trust the bucket. I want a second opinion.

(Scene changes to Gobber and Stoick visiting Gothi's Hut)

Stoick: Gothi, I've come for your council. Is there going to be a storm?

(Gothi starts writing in a pile of dirt]

Stoick: What's she saying, Gobber?

Gobber: She says: "What do you think?" Huh?

(Gothi points to the various preparations she herself have already made for bad weather)

Stoick: How can you be so sure? Was it the chicken bones? Or the goose feet?

Gobber: She says she could hear Bucket's screaming from way up here.

(Scene changes to the Dragon Riders lounging around on a large catapult)

Hiccup: ...And then the dragons used their wings to block the snow.

Fishlegs: I've never heard of anything like that. Not even in the Book of Dragons.

Astrid: I know! It was incredible! It was as if their protective instincts just kicked in!

Hiccup: Who'd believe it? The dragons we fought for years came to our rescue.

Astrid: Yeah, if it weren't for them, we would've frozen to death.

Fishlegs: You know what? You could've used your own bodies to keep each other warm.

Astrid: Um...

(Astrid and Hiccup scoot away from each other)

Hiccup: Who would do that?

Astrid: That's crazy.

Snotlout: Hey, Astrid. If you're still cold... [Makes kiss-y faces)

(Astrid elbows the catapult and a pile of snow drops on Snotlout)

Snotlout: Hey!

(The Twins arrive below, on the ground)

Tuffnut: Hey, Hiccup!

Tuffnut: Your father's looking for you.

Ruffnut: He looked angry.

Hiccup: He's looked angry since the day I was born. But I'm sure there's no connection. (Flies off on Toothless)

(Scene change to inside the Haddock House with Gobber, Stoick, and Hiccup)

Stoick: There's a bad storm coming. We could be locked in. We might not be able to hunt or fish for months!

Hiccup: But it's way too early for a storm. We're in the middle of winter! Devastating Winter isn't due for another month!

Stoick: Not according to Gothi.

Hiccup: Well, what am I supposed to do? I can't control the weather!

Stoick: No... but you can control dragons. If they don't stop scaring the animals we won't have any provisions to live on.

(Bucket and Mulch enter with an empty bucket)

Stoick: Ah! Any luck?

Mulch: Not a drop. And this is after yankin' on that poor yak for three hours!

Hiccup: But it's not like the dragons are trying to be scary. I mean, they don't even eat farm animals. They eat fish!

Gobber: True but they're huge, they breathe fire, and now that we've made peace with them, they're everywhere. The animals are terrified of them.

Stoick: Here's where you jump in and say 'I'll fix this'.

Hiccup: Okay. But how long do I have before the storm hits?

Mulch: About a week.

Hiccup: No problem. More than enough time.

(Bucket grabs his bucket head and starts moaning)

Mulch: Correction: three days, six hours.

Hiccup: Uh, okay... less time... might be more of a problem.

(Scene changes, showing a storm starting to brew near Berk. The gang is in the arena with livestock, trying to get them used to the dragons.)

Hiccup: Come on, big boy. You can do it. Come on. [Tries to push a yak closer to the dragons)

Hiccup: You'll really like them if you get to know them.

Astrid: The dragons look scary but they're just big, scaly reptiles.

Tuffnut: Just like Snotlout.

Snotlout: (Picks up Tuffnut to punch him) You're the guy, right?

Tuffnut: (High-pitched voice] No.

(One dragon snaps at another dragon and the yak runs away)

Fishlegs: Okay, what if we look at this from an animal's perspective? (Gets down on his hands and knees and walks up to a Nightmare)

Fishlegs: Oh, hello, Mr. Dragon! I'm just a little sheep here... walking... doing sheep things... Baaa!

Fishlegs: Baaa! You know, he doesn't really seem so big and--

(The Nightmare roars at him showing a mouth full of teeth. Fishlegs runs on all fours under Meatlug)

Fishlegs: Sorry! But I'm siding with the sheep on this one.

Hiccup: Look, I've learned that once you have a positive experience with something you're afraid of, it isn't so scary anymore.

Hiccup: (Herds three sheep over to the Nightmare) Okay, here you go boys... over here. And that's what we'll have to do with these sheep. We gotta prove to them that they have nothing to fear--

(The Nightmare blows fire on the sheeps' wool for fun and they run away)

Hiccup: Ooh-aaah-at this rate we'll never get any milk or eggs!

(Storm is starting to get worse and the sky around Berk gets darker. Stoick is inspecting the storehouse)

Stoick: Just as I feared. We haven't had time to fully stock the food store house!

Stoick: If this storm is as bad as I think it is, we're never going to survive!

Gobber: Not with this inventory.

Stoick: We're going to need everything we can get from those chickens and yaks.

Gobber: I'm not really comfortable putting my fate in the hands of a brainless bird and a big woolly beast that sleeps in its own dung.

Stoick: Well luckily our fate isn't in their hands. It's in my son's.

(Scene changes back to the arena where everything is running amok)

Hiccup: Another way for the animals to overcome their fear is to show them that dragons are afraid of things too.

Astrid: Remember Magnus the Merciless? He was a pretty scary guy. I was afraid of him until I learned that he was afraid of the dark.

Tuffnut: So during the day: merciless

Ruffnut: And during the night: Tuffnut!

Ruffnut: Ow!

Tuffnut: Hey! That's a real problem.

Astrid: I'm just saying, knowing he was afraid of something made him less scary to me.

Hiccup: Yes, So let's show the yaks that dragons are afraid of things, too.

(Pulls two eels out of a basket, walks by the yaks, and over to the dragons. Dragons balk as the yaks observe)

Astrid: I think it's working!

(Hiccup drops an eel and it slithers toward the Nightmare, causing the dragon to knock a sheep against the wall)

Astrid: Don't worry.

Hiccup: Worry? I-I'm not worried! Do I look worried?

(Scene changes to the Great Hall, where villagers are filing in with their belongings. The weather is worsening)

Stoick: Bring in everything you need! We down know how long we'll need to be hunkered down!

Stoick: How's Bucket doing?

Mulch: Look at him! He usually loves a wheelbarrow ride.

Stoick: Mulch, I'll take care of Bucket. You and Gobber go find the kids and bring them here.

(Things are still running amok in the Arena)

Astrid: Hey! Calm down! Get back over here!

Hiccup: You know what I'm learning from all this? Chicken are really, well, chicken.

Fishlegs: What if we showed them how much they have in common with the Dragons? They both lay eggs right? A Terrible Terror laid one last week!

(Fishlegs sets down a large dragon egg. Three chickens jump on it and check it out)

Hiccup: Alright, see? An egg's an egg, right ladies?

(The egg explodes)

Hiccup: Until it explodes...

(Mulch and Gobber arrive at the Arena. It's starting to snow)

Gobber: Everybody out, the storm is here!

Hiccup: Ah, wha-wait! We haven't made any progress with the animals!

Gobber: Your father wants everyone in the Great Hall!

Hiccup: Take the others. I need to stay and keep working with the animals. They're... still afraid.

Gobber: Yeh can't get eggs from a frozen chicken! We've got to get the animals in the barn!

(Scene changes to the farm, which is buried in snow already)

Gobber: So much for the barn.

Mulch: There's no other place to hold them!

Hiccup: The Great Hall!

Mulch: So, we're gonna have the dragons and the animals under the same roof? We know that won't work.

Hiccup: We have no choice, let's go.

(Dragons, Humans, and livestock trek down the snowy mountain)

Gobber: Alright, keep 'em separate!

Astrid: This way!

Fishlegs: Come on, come on! Let's go! Oh, this way guys!

(Lightning strikes a tree, which scares the dragons who in turn scare the livestock, causing them to scatter.)

Snotlout: Hey, I got this under control! (Snotlout stands in front of stampeding yaks, then gets trampled) Ow! Ow! Ow! Ooooh... ow! Okay, everything hurts.

(Everyone tries to stop the fleeing and scattering animals)

Gobber: Where are you going?!

Hiccup: I'm going after them!

Gobber: Forget it Hiccup! We'll never get them rounded up in this storm!

Hiccup: With Toothless, I can! I have to try. If I don't, we starve to death.

Gobber: No! Your father will kill me if I left you out here--!

Hiccup: Sorry, Gobber! (Takes off on Toothless)

Gobber: Hiccup! Come back here! (Turns to talk to Astrid who mounts Stormfly) Astrid, will you talk some sense-- Ah--No, no, not you, too! Astrid! You're not going with-- Ach! (The rest of the Riders leave on their dragons) GET BACK HERE, ALL OF YOU!

(Back in the Great Hall]

Stoick: Move those tables against the against the doors!

Gobber: Stoick! The barns been destroyed! The animals have scattered!

Stoick: Where's Hiccup and the others?

Gobber: I tried to stop him Stoick. They went after the animals.

Mulch: I caught these two. (Yaks) I figured at least with these we'd be able to start a new herd.

Gobber: You might want to take another look, Mulch.

Mulch: Oh! Uh, never mind boys!

(In the forest in the middle of a snow storm, the Riders look for livestock)

Hiccup: You find as many as you can. We'll herd them back to the Great Hall.

Fishlegs: Can we swing by my house? I'd like to get my heavy coat.

Tuffnut: Check this out! (Tuffnut punches himself) I'm so cold I can't feel my face. (Ruffnut slaps his face) Didn't feel it!

Ruffnut: That takes all the fun out of it!

Hiccup: They they are! Come on!

Fishlegs: Yaks to the left!

Snotlout: Chickens to the right!

Snotlout: Hey! I'm flying here!

Snotlout: Chickens! Over here! Follow me this way. Come on!

Snotlout: Wait. Where are you going? AHHHH!

Fishlegs: Sheep! Hey, sheep, this way! Baaahh! Baah! Baah! Hey, it's working! Baah! Baahh... (Fishlegs and Meatlug get stuck under a fallen tree)

Astrid: I got them! Now! (Stormfly shoots spines to form a fence) Gotcha!

Snotlout: GAAAHHH! (Hookfang flies around erratically and knocks down the spines)

Astrid: Snotlout, what are you doing?! You're all over the place!

Snotlout: YOU TRY HERDING CHICKENS WITH A DRAGON WHO DOESN'T LISTEN TO YOU!

Astrid: Hiccup! Stray sheep! (Toothless saves a lamb that slid off a cliff)

Hiccup: Good job, bud.

Astrid: Hiccup, the storm is getting worse! I can't see anything!

Hiccup: Come on, bud. Give us some light. Stray yaks, twelve o'clock!

Tuffnut: I see them! AND THEY ARE HUGE!

Tuffnut: I got the yaks. (Grabs Stoick and Gobber)

Stoick: Put me down! Right now! (Barf and Belch drop Stoick and Gobber)

Gobber: Do I look like a yak to you?!

Stoick: You shouldn't be out here, Hiccup. (Hiccup lands, followed by the other Riders)

Hiccup: Dad, I'm sorry I let you down.

Stoick: It's not your fault, son. I'm taking you back.

Gobber: Which way?

Stoick: Follow our tracks. (The snow covered their tracks)

Gobber: So much for that idea.

Fishlegs: Sir? What do we do now? ([Everyone is shivering)

Stoick: Everyone, come together. (The humans all huddle together to try and stay warm)

(The dragons start to surround the humans and form a protective ring.)

Stoick: What are they doing?

Hiccup: They're protecting us.

Astrid: It's their natural instinct.

(The dragons lay down some fire and lava to provide warmth. The lamb and his family are out in the snow. Toothless invites them into the circle for protection. Slowly all the livestock move into the dragons' circle for the duration of the storm)

Stoick: Your dragons are really something, son.

Hiccup: Yeah, they are.

(After the storm, the Riders, dragons, and livestock return to the Great Hall)

Mulch: They're back! And they're alright!

Bucket: The animals are alright, too!

Mulch: Uh-oh. Here come the dragons.

Mulch: Will you look at that.

Astrid: Hey everyone!

Hiccup: The chickens are laying eggs again!

Bucket: I was right. Chickens do lay eggs.

Hiccup (v.o.): Winter in Berk is long and brutal, and the only way to survive it is if we're all in it together. We made our peace with the dragons when we saw that we could trust them. Turns out they actually have instincts to protect us. All of us. Life on Berk just got a little warmer.

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