How to Pick Your Dragon (transcript)

Written below is a transcript of the Dragons: Riders of Berk television show episode How to Pick Your Dragon.

Transcript
Hiccup (v.o.) Here on Berk, we've always done things one way: the Viking Way. Since the dragons came, the Viking Way has become, well, the Hard Way. Unfortunately some people, like my father, still refuse to change. Gobber It's that rogue dragon again. That's the second boat this week he's destroyed. Stoick Well, we lost another whole catch. He could have saved it if we'd gotten there sooner. Hiccup Well, I know how you could have gotten there sooner. Stoick Here we go again. Hiccup If you'd flown there on a dragon you could have been there in five minutes instead of two hours. And you might even have been able to chase that rogue dragon away for good. Stoick As the chief of Berk, I do things the Viking Way. Not the Dragon Way. Hiccup Well, the Viking way is costing us a lot of fish and almost as many boats. Gobber The boy's got a point. If you were on a dragon you could protect this island from a lot of things. Even Alvin. Hiccup Right! You-You could use a dragon to-- Stoick You're right Gobber. Alvin knows we have dragons. He'll be back. Gobber You saw what those dragons did. They had Alvin on the run. Imagine if you were the one commanding them. Stoick I'm listening. Hiccup But clearly not to me. Gobber I can see it know. A proud chief ruling his domain above aboard a fearsome fire-breathing reptile. Ooooh, it gives me goosebumps. Hiccup That's what I've been trying to-- Stoick Gobber's right. Stoick I need to learn to fly. When do we start the lessons? Hiccup I don't know, shouldn't we ask Gobber? Gobber Eh, I don't really have a preference, but sooner is always better. Don'tcha think? Hiccup Alright, I've made a new stirrup so you'll be able to control Toothless. Stoick You hear that? It's me that's supposed to be controlling you. Hiccup Whoa, whoa, Dad, uh, before you get on a dragon you've got to show him he can trust you. Stoick He already trusts me. I'm his chief! Hiccup Uh, it's very simple. Just give me your hand. Stoick I didn't come here to hold hands, Hiccup. Hiccup It's okay, bud. Hiccup You feel that? Stoick Yeah. Still dry and scaly. Hiccup That's not what I meant. Stoick Can I get on him now? Stoick Alright, let's get on with this madness. Hiccup We'll start out nice and slowly. Just give him a little nudge when you wanna-- Hiccup I SAID NUDGE! Stoick That was my nudge! Hiccup Just remember, the tail controls everything. Stoick I know that. Hiccup Then why are you heading for that rock?! Stoick Because you're distracting me! Hiccup Just let out the-- Stoick TAIL! I KNOW! Hiccup Left! LEFT! No, no, the other left! Stoick Dragon's fault. Hiccup You gonna blame that on the dragon too, Dad? Stoick Yep. Hiccup SLOW DOWN! Stoick I'm trying! Stoick See? Hiccup Actually, no. No, I had my eyes closed! Hiccup You're coming in to hard! Open the tail! With your foot! Stoick I'm opening the tail. Hiccup That's my leg, Dad! Hiccup I am so sorry. Hiccup Dad, wait. Where are you going? Stoick Nah, I'm done with this, Hiccup! I've got a village to look after. Stoick I'll need a ride home. Stoick This isn't the way home. Hiccup Just sit back and enjoy the ride! We are taking the scenic route! Stoick Right now my lunch is taking the scenic route into my throat! Hiccup Dad, just think about how much easier your chiefing can be on the back of a dragon. Stoick Well, I prefer to be down on the-- Wait. What's going on over there? Stoick Some genius has been yak-tipping again. Tuffnut Be quiet. Maybe they don't see us. Stoick Make that geniuses. I want every one those yaks back on its feet! Hiccup Nice chiefing, Dad! Let's see what else we can get done today! Hiccup Toothless, fire! Stoick Fire again, dragon. Hiccup Dad, the boars are gone. Stoick Who cares? I like the sound it makes. Hiccup Take us up, bud. There's something else I want you to see. Stoick Whoa. I've spent my entire life on Berk. Climbed its hills, explored its forests, swam its waters. I've travelled every inch, but I never thought I'd see it like this. Hiccup It's beautiful, isn't it? Stoick No, it's more than that Hiccup. Look at them. All of my people. Everyone is safe. It's a good feeling. Hiccup Toothless? Toothless? DAD?! Astrid Was that--? Fishlegs Unexpected? Disturbing? Astrid Yep. Hiccup Uh, Dad, what are you doing? Stoick Kicking butt and taking names, that's what! Hiccup Uh, on Toothless? Stoick Oh, we've been all over Berk. Chiefing has never been so easy. Hiccup Yeah, but Dad, uh, Toothless is my dragon. Stoick You picked a good one. Just came in to grab my hatchet. We're helping Jorgensen break down a fence. Hiccup Yeah, that's, that's great, but you need to understand that Toothless is-- Stoick Oh, you're right. I don't need my hatchet. Toothless can just blow that fence down with a fireball. Ha-ha! Up, dragon. Hiccup Don't worry, bud. I can fix this. Hiccup So, see ya there, Toothless. I really hope... Viking Thank you, Stoick! Stoick Well done! Viking Thank you, Stoick! Stoick Come on, Toothless, faster! Stoick Attaboy! Stoick Same time tomorrow, Toothless? Hiccup You see that? That's what it looks like to be ridden all day by a four-hundred-pound man. Astrid At least you got your Dad on a dragon. Hiccup Yeah, now I just need to figure out how to get him off one. Astrid Why don't you just give him the ol' "Honey and The Hatchet"? Astrid You know, you tell him something he wants to hear, that's the "Honey" part, before you hit him in the head with something he doesn't. You know, "The Hatchet". Hiccup Why does your advice always involve weapons? Stoick Toothless? Toothless? Stoick Where's Toothless? Hiccup Ah, I don't know, but you... Look great, Dad! What is it? Are you, d-did you do something with your beard? Stoick Alright, you've given me the honey, now just give me the hatchet. Hiccup Look, Dad, you can't just keep taking Toothless. He's mine. Stoick Alright. That seems fair. So, find me one. Hiccup Uh, sorry? Stoick Find me a dragon as good as Toothless. That shouldn't be so hard for the Head of the Berk Dragon Training Academy. Hiccup The finest dragon species on the island. They're all represented at this Academy. Snotlout But the Monstrous Nightmare is the only one with the brawn and prestige for men of our stature. Hop on board. Feel the Monstrous Nightmare difference. And on those cold winter nights, its whole body heats up. Just enough to keep you cozy. Lemme warm him up for you. Stoick Daaahhh!! Snotlout Now should I put you down for one? They come in an assortment of colors. Astrid Since she's beautiful, people think she's not tough. But you should never underestimate me. Uh, her--uh, us. Stoick Well, she is a beauty. Astrid Be careful with the--! Snotlout Monstrous Nightmare's looking a little better now, huh, Chief? Stoick Next! Stoick Next! Fishlegs Lemme tell you, what you're really looking for is loyalty. A dragon who will be there for you no matter what. The last face you see at night and the first face you see in the morning. Warming your bed when it's cold outside, a shoulder to cry on when the world has turned its back on you. How could you not love a Gronckle? Stoick Sorry, son. But I'm looking for a dragon. Not a mother. Stoick I haven't seen anything that can hold a candle to a Night Fury. Hiccup Me neither! But Toothless is the only Night Fury on Berk. And he's mine. Gobber Stoick! Another boat is being attacked! It's the rogue dragon again. Stoick Let's go! Hiccup Oh, right... What was I thinking? Hiccup At least he blocks the wind... Hiccup I don't believe it. A Thunderdrum! They say it gets its power from Thor himself. Stoick Fire a warning shot. Let him know we mean business. Hiccup Toothless! Plasma blast! Hiccup I think we scared him off, but we've got to get everyone out of here. Stoick Come on, lads! We'll escort you back to shore. You'll have no more-- Bucket No more what?! Hiccup Dad! Mulch Uh, Stoick can swim, right? Stoick Oh, he's a fighter! He's got spunk! This is the one, Hiccup! I've found my dragon! Now all you have to do is train him for me. Hiccup Sorry about the muzzle. Stoick Alright, let's get me on his back. Times a-wastin'. Hiccup Now we just got to get one in his size. Stoick What was that? Hiccup Nothing. Hiccup Look. You have to approach him properly, Dad. Especially a dragon like this. He is one of the most powerful dragons I've ever seen. Stoick That's why I picked him. They say his roar gets its power from Thor himself! He's the God of Thunder, you know. Hiccup So I've heard. Still. You have to let the dragon know you're a friend. Stoick A friend, huh? Oh! Like me and Gobber? Hiccup Yeah, perfect! What did you do when you two met? Stoick "That's my wife you're talking to, you one-legged lout!" Hiccup Not exactly the approach I had in mind. Dad, what's real important is that you let him know that he can trust you. You have to make eye contact. Stoick Uh-huh. Sure. Hiccup Stay calm. Be gentle. And you'll know you've formed a bond when he bows his head to let you climb on his back. Hiccup Hey, hey! Whoa! What happened to trust? Stoick Talk to him! He's the one who tried to take off my hand! Hiccup Would you stop it, Dad? This is not bonding. Stoick Ah! You got to show these beasts who's boss! Stoick Look at that, I'm on his back! Any questions? Hiccup Oh, too many to ask. Stoick Wah-ho! Easy! Don't you know who I am? Hiccup I talk to him, but my dad just doesn't listen! It's like I'm wasting my breath. Gobber I got it! Hiccup Thank you. At least somebody understands me... Gobber I meant this. Nasty. Gobber Now what were you saying? Hiccup Ugh! My father! Gobber Right! Stoick. Gobber Let me explain something about fathers and sons. It's a father's job to listen to his son without ever letting on that he's heard a word. Stoick (o.s.) Hiccup! Hiccup Dad, what happened? Stoick Ah, the beast threw me off and flew off to Thor-knows-where. Hiccup Well, can you blame him? All you ever did was fight him! Stoick Dah! He loved it! Hiccup Yeah, apparently not. Stoick We can stand here arguing, or we can go get my dragon. Stoick Alright! We have to fan out and cover every part of the island! Hiccup Ruffnut and Tuffnut, you take-- Stoick You take the West side! Tuffnut You got it, Chief. Hiccup Can anybody even see me back here?! Stoick WEST SIDE! Stoick Snotlout, to the North side! Astrid Come on, Fishlegs. We'll take the East side. Fishlegs But-but it's allergy season. Astrid Fishlegs! Fishlegs Not me. It's her. Stoick Well, your friends sure are an odd bunch, but they sure know what they're doing on those dragons. Hiccup Thank you. I think... Hiccup Okay, when we find the dragon you might wanna think about approaching him...differently. Obviously he doesn't like being pushed around so-- Stoick There he is! Hiccup And, once again, not a word goes through... Hiccup Settle down, bud. Stoick Let me handle this. Stoick This dragon's mine. Hiccup Dad! Stoick There's another Thunderdrum in there. Hiccup He's hurt. Stoick Well, he-he's protecting his friend. That's why he's been taking all those fish. Go get the others. And tell Gobber to get ready. Hiccup Dad, I can't just leave you here! Stoick Go! Stoick Looks like it's just you and me, big fella. Stoick I want to help, trust me. Stoick Ah, they smell the blood of your wounded friend. Stoick Aww look at us! We're bonded! Hiccup What. Happened? Stoick Ah, we battled a few boars, did a little bonding. Hiccup You? Stoick Of course! There's something you should know about dragons. It's all about trust. Hiccup So you actually heard that? Stoick Yes. I just said it. I listen. Stoick Take good care of him. He's a friend. Hiccup (v.o.) My dad still does things the Viking Way. Fortunately, Toothless and I showed him that the Viking Way can also be the Dragon Way.